I recently came across a “perfect man” list that I wrote in the summer of 1967 after having ended a relationship. What was interesting to me is that in 1967 I had no concept of the Law of Attraction yet I wrote a request for certain qualities that were important to me in a significant other as if the universe would answer my request. Not long after my request, the universe sent me two young men each having all of the qualities that I had asked for: honest, caring, kind, sense of humor, ambitious, fun loving, athletic, etc. I dated both and in the summer of 1968, I made a choice.
Although both men had similar qualities and I felt deeply for both, I had a very different experience of myself with each man. With one man, I always felt a level of anxiety and a need to perform in a certain way although he did nothing overtly to elicit that response in me. He was genuinely a nice person and fun to be with. On the other hand, I felt totally safe and calm with the other man, and I could relax and be me. I eventually chose this man and we have been married for 39 years.
When we announce to the universe that we want a significant other with certain qualities and attributes by making a list and posting it on our wall, the universe will respond and give us what we ask for. It is up to us to decide how we feel when we are in that other persons company; what is the experience of ourselves in their presence. Are we calm or anxious; Do we feel strong or weak; Are we feeling safe or is there a level of uncertainty.
All of our feelings about ourselves give us intuitive clues as to whether or not this person is right for us. Most of us do not listen to that little voice inside that is communicating through our feelings, telling us that something just isn’t right or something is missing. I have heard many clients say “I should have followed my intuition sooner”. Sometimes we may need to make a difficult choice in rejecting a particular relationship simply because of the way we feel about ourselves when we are around that person. This can be especially difficult when we don’t know if another relationship will ever come.
My advice to you is: Make your list of qualities you are looking for in a significant other. Make that list as comprehensive as possible, leave nothing out. Look at that list everyday and believe that the right relationship is coming to you. I do know that the universe will give us what we ask for and a new, more rewarding relationship is possible when we follow our intuition and listen to that little voice inside.
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